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WITandWISDOM(tm) - July 31, 1998


Arrogance is a garment of denial shrouding a wounded soul.

(Shared by Encounter Weekly http://www.gospelcom.net/actsi/weekly/)



(Dedicated in loving memory to my Grandma.)
- Author Unknown

A man stopped at a flower shop to order some flowers to be wired to his mother who lived two hundred miles away. As he got out of his car he noticed a young girl sitting on the curb sobbing. He asked her what was wrong and she replied, "I wanted to buy a red rose for my mother. But I only have seventy-five cents, and a rose costs two dollars."

The man smiled and said, "Come on in with me. I'll buy you a rose." He bought the little girl her rose and ordered his own mother's flowers. As they were leaving he offered the girl a ride home. She said, "Yes, please! You can take me to my mother."

She directed him to a cemetery, where she placed the rose on a freshly dug grave.

The man returned to the flower shop, canceled the wire order, picked up a bouquet and drove the two hundred miles to his mother's house.

(Shared by Just 4 Laughs! Http://www.GeoCities.com/Hollywood/Set/6993)



10. Hey! It's MY turn to sit on the front pew!

9. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went over time 25 minutes.

8. Personally, I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf.

7. I've decided to give our church the $500.00 a month I used to send to TV evangelists.

6. I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the Junior High Sunday School class.

5. Forget the denominational minimum salary: let's pay our pastor so s/he can live like we do.

4. I love it when we sing hymns I've never heard before!

3. Since we're all here, let's start the worship service early!

2. Pastor, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas.

. . . And the number one thing you probably never heard in Church:

1. Nothing inspires me and strengthens my commitment like our annual stewardship campaign!

(Shared by Kitty's Daily Mews http://www.katscratch.com)


Mrs. Squiffy decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant."

"But you are not wearing any of those things."

"I know," said Mrs. Squiffy. "It's in case I should die before my husband. I'm sure he will remarry, and I want his new wife to go nuts looking for the jewelry."

(Shared by Kitty's Daily Mews http://www.katscratch.com)


Why is it better to have round manhole covers than square ones? . . . This is logical rather than lateral, but it is a good puzzle which can be solved by lateral thinking techniques. It is supposedly used by a very well-known software company as an interview question for prospective employees.

A square manhole cover can be turned and dropped down the diagonal of the manhole. A round manhole cannot be dropped down the manhole. So for safety and practicality, all manhole covers should be round.

(Shared by Big Al via Fast Eddie's Funnies http://recommend-it.com/l.z.e?s=154533)

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