WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WIT & WISDOM - September 8, 1998

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

Contentment isn't getting what we want, but being satisfied with what we have. [1]



While at the park one day, a woman sat down next to a man on a bench near a playground. "That's my son over there," she said, pointing to a little boy in a red sweater who was gliding down the slide.

"He's a fine looking boy," the man said. "That's my son on the swing in the blue sweater." Then, looking at his watch, he called to his son. "What do you say we go, Todd?"

Todd pleaded, "Just five more minutes, Dad. Please? Just five more minutes." The man nodded and Todd continued to swing to his heart's content.

Minutes passed and the father stood and called again to his son. "Time to go now?" Again Todd pleaded, "Five more minutes, Dad. Just five more minutes." The man smiled and said, "O.K."

"My, you certainly are a patient father," the woman responded.

The man smiled and then said, "My older son Tommy was killed by a drunk driver last year while he was riding his bike near here. I never spent much time with Tommy and now I 'd give anything for just five more minutes with him. I've vowed not to make the same mistake with Todd. He thinks he has five more minutes to swing. The truth is, I get Five more minutes to watch him play." [2]

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:


10. Statistics show that the front of the church building is the safest in the event of a natural disaster.

9. You can see if anything's caught between the Preacher's teeth. Then watch him as you smile and point.

8. There's still lots of padding in these kneelers since they are almost like new.

7. You only have to comb the back of your hair and iron the back of your shirt.

6. It's easier to trip the ushers.

5. No one will hear your stomach make those 'alien' noises.

4. You're the Treasurer and want to keep your eye on the collection.

3. You want to justify that feeling you've always had that every ones looking at you.

2. You're mad at everyone in the church and want to make sure no one sits beside you.

And the #1 reason for sitting at the front of the church is . . .
1. You actually love worshiping God and feeding on His Word! [3]


The teacher smiled at her Sunday school group and exclaimed, "All right, class, all those who want to go to Heaven raise your hands." Everybody in the class had a hand raised, except one boy. "Don't you want to go to Heaven?" asked the teacher. "I can't ma'am. My mom wants me to come straight home." [4]

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Robert E. Lee, of the Confederate Army, remains the only person, to date, to have graduated from the West Point military academy without a single demerit. [5]


[1] (Robbi Mikkola)
[2] (John L. Bechtel)
[3] (MONDAY FODDER dgaufaaa@iohk.com)
[4] (Patty Patterson)
[5] (Fast Eddie's Funnies http://recommend-it.com/l.z.e?s=154533)

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