WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WITandWISDOM(tm) - August 13, 1999

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

There is no duty we so much underrate as the duty of being happy. - Robert Louis Stevenson (1850-1894)

(E-zine: DAILY BITS http://www.DailyBits.com)

~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:

Climb till your dream comes true
often your tasks will be many,
and more than you think you can do. . .
Often the road will be rugged
and the hills insurmountable, too. . .

But always remember, the hills ahead
Are never as steep as they seem,
And with FAITH in your heart start upward
And climb 'till you reach your dream,

For nothing in life that is worthy
Is ever too hard to achieve
If you have the courage to try it
And you have the FAITH to believe…

For FAITH is a force that is greater
Than knowledge or power or skill
And many defeats turn to triumph
If you trust in GOD"S wisdom and will

For Faith is a mover of mountains,
There's nothing that God cannot do,
So start out today with Faith in your heart
And "CLIMB "TILL YOUR DREAM COMES TRUE"!
- Helen Steiner Rice

(Jim Stern)

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:

After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced: "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as can be everything has shifted."

Once on a Southwest flight, the pilot said, "We've reached our cruising altitude now, and I'm turning off the seat belt sign. I'm switching to autopilot, too, so I can come back there and visit with all of you for the rest of the flight."

"Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or adults acting like children."

"Last one off the plane must clean it."

After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the Flight Attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt up against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal.

Part of a Flight Attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of us here at US Airways."

(E-zine: KITTY'S DAILY MEWS http://www.katscratch.com)

~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:

In my younger days, we had a stubborn old mule on the farm. We had a storage shed on farm, and some dynamite inside it. One day, my brother left the door to the storage shed open, and that mule got inside.

After feasting on some of that dynamite, he went back to the barnyard and aggravated a cow, which then proceeded to kick the mule in the stomach.

The mule exploded with a K-A-B-O-O-M!!

The explosion killed 37 chickens, 5 hogs, the cow, and for three weeks that mule was the sickest critter you ever saw in your life!
By Carl Overcash

(Matthew J Smith)

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Did you know about these measurements?

One billion seconds is about 31.7 years.

Melting an ice cube in your mouth burns 2.3 calories.

American astronauts must be under 6 feet.

If your eyes are six feet above the surface of the ocean, the horizon will be about three statue miles away.

(E-zine: Today's Useless Facts Mailto:Useless_Facts-subscribe@listbot.com)


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