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WITandWISDOM(tm) - February 15, 2000
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but whoever looks at it when it has been in the house three days? - George Bernard Shaw
(E-zine: INSPIRE http://www.infoadvn.com/inspire/ )
~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:
While preparing a paper regarding God taking away his guilt, a student erroneously wrote, "The quilt was taken away."
Upon receiving the paper, the amused professor wrote back: "Don't be concerned that your quilt was taken away; a comforter is promised (John 14:16)"
(Penny J. Nielsen)
~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:
IT SURE SEEMS THIS WAY SOMETIMES
My pastor shapes his sermons
From A to final Z
In clear and forthright language,
And aims them straight at me.
And when he gets to preaching,
I look around to see
If there might be another
Deserving more than me.
But every soul looks saintly --
Their hearts to Heaven turn --
While I, in my conviction,
Can only sit and squirm.
You know, I often wonder,
If I should miss a day;
Would he, without his target,
Have anything to say?
- Author Unknown
(E-zine: MONDAY FODDER Mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org?subject=Subscribe_Monday_Fodder)
~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:
A Portrait Of My Brother Mikey (Willie A.)
One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis, an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter's portrait for a class assignment. Peter agreed, and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus.
The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor.
The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting were incorrect.
"The head is too big," the professor explained. "The shoulders are too wide, and the feet are enormous."
The next day, the art student brought Peter to see the professor. He took one look at my brother. "Okay, A minus," he said.
(E- zine: THE FUNNIES Mailto:andychaps_the-funnies- email@example.com)
A professor in Switzerland warned her class to beware of polls and pollsters, "They can get any answer they want with loaded questions," she warned. She cited the case of Swiss voters who replied "no" when asked if they approved of smoking while praying. "The vote turned to ‘yes' when the same people were asked if they approved of praying while smoking," she told her class.
- Bits & Pieces, October 14, 1993
(Magazine: BITS & PIECES http://www.epinc.com/ )