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WITandWISDOM(tm) - July 5, 2001
Thinking a smile all the time will keep your face youthful. - Frank Gelett Burgess (1866-1951)
Submitted by Udi Latarre
~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:
During quail season in Georgia, an Atlanta journalist met an old farmer hunting with an ancient pointer at his side. Twice the dog ran rheumatically ahead and pointed. Twice his master fired into the open air. When the journalist saw no birds rise, he asked the farmer for an explanation.
"Shucks," grinned the old man, "I knew there weren't no birds in that grass. Spot's nose ain't what it used to be. But him and me have had some wonderful times together. He's still doing the best he can - and it'd be mighty mean of me to call him a liar at this stage of the game!"
Source: Bits & Pieces, August 20, 1992, Copyright (c) Economic Press, Inc., http://www.epinc.com
~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:
NOT SO DEEP THOUGHTS . . .
Now that I've given up hope I feel much better...
It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere!
Without Time, everything would happen at once.
Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
This is as bad as it can get, but don't bet on it.
There is no substitute for genuine lack of preparation.
By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world.
Everything should be made as simple as possible but no simpler.
It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
Source: Humor Digest (Discontinued)
~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:
Andy Says...Just Think About This!
Archeologist: A man whose career lies in ruins.
A tree never hits an automobile except in self-defense.
Source: The Funnies, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/andychaps_the-funnies
As managing director of Lever Chile, S.A., the packaged-goods company, Giorgio Maschietto was responsible for running a string of factories in South America, including a giant Pepsodent toothpaste plant
For years the factory had used a set of highly delicate and highly expensive scales beneath the toothpaste conveyer belt. Their purpose was to make sure each carton of toothpaste actually contained a tube. But the high-tech scales never quite worked. "Sometimes," Maschietto says, "we used to seal up empty cartons and send them out.
"One of the ideas of the men on the line was to replace all this expensive machinery and just put a small jet of air across the conveyer belt where the tubes rolled by. The compressed air is regulated so that when the carton is empty, the pressure of the air is enough to throw the empty cartons off the belt."
Source: Bits & Pieces, February 1, 1996, Copyright (c) Economic Press, Inc., http://www.epinc.com