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WITandWISDOM(tm) - May 28, 2002
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. - Corrie Ten Boom, author and Holocaust survivor

Source: EMAZING, http://www.emazing.com/

Subjects: Trains, Trust

~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:

Somehow Abraham Lincoln understood that success means being willing to fall forward, face to the mud, and keep getting up again, ever plodding toward the goal. But if you must fall, fall forward. Once he was in politics he proceeded to lose election after election. In his lifetime Lincoln won elected office four times, but he lost ten times. That's more than two losses for every win. Tough luck! And he found him-self married to an emotionally disturbed woman. He suffered periods of deep depression. During one of them his friends decided to keep all sharp objects away from him.

He was finally elected President of the United States. And then things really got rough! Lincoln was vilified and excoriated as few men have ever been, particularly after he proclaimed emancipation to the slaves. To excoriate means to strip off the flesh, only it's done with words. Every day he faced a barrage of the most scathing criticism from the press. Few men have ever been so hated by so many people.

Even his now-famous Gettysburg Address was maligned. Here's how that played in the press. The Patriot and Union said of his speech: "The president succeeded on this occasion because he acted without sense and without constraint in a panorama that was gotten up more for the benefit of his party than for the glory of the nation and the honor of the dead. We pass over the silly remarks of the president; for the credit of the nation we are willing that the veil of oblivion shall be dropped over them and that they shall no more be repeated or thought of."

Referring to the Gettysburg Address, The Chicago Times printed: "The cheek of every American must tingle with shame as he reads the silly, flat, and dishwatery utterances of the man who has to be pointed out to intelligent foreigners as the President of the United States."

Now I think any reasonable man would have to conclude, based on the way the press treated him, that this man was a loser. Today we regard him as perhaps our greatest leader.

One of the rules of life is that the higher you go, the more you get shot at. In fact, the most criticized being in the universe is God Himself, and yet He is absolutely perfect. Criticism is the price of being a leader.

Source: Never Give Up by Tim Crosby, Copyright (c) 2001 by The Quiet Hour http://www.thequiethour.org/

Subjects: Abraham Lincoln, Success

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

THEATRE-LOBBY NOTICES
By Andy Borovitz

WARNING: Owing to a typographical error, the Times review of this play omitted the word "horrible."

WARNING: When the curtain rises, you maybe startled by the sight of a former movie stars ravaged face.

WARNING: During this afternoon's performance, there will be a chatty women's group from Great Neck seated directly behind you.

WARNING: People who do not find plays about incurable bone diseases entertaining should probably go home right now.

WARNING: In interviews, the composer of tonight's long-delayed musical has referred to it as both "a pet project" and "a labor of love."

WARNING: Any audience members you may hear laughing this evening have been paid handsomely to do so.

WARNING: Tonight's play is being produced despite explicit instructions in the dead playwrights will to "burn all remaining copies to a crisp."

WARNING: This play has a title that is very similar to that of another play currently running on Broadway, which is the one you meant to buy tickets for.

WARNING: Tonight's play is performed without an intermission and you will be stuck here forever.

Source: The New Yorker, January 7, 2002, http://www.newyorker.com

Subjects: Warnings

~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:

There's a technical meteorological term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days. It's called a "Monday."

Source: Gentle Humor, mailto:words@iop.com?subject=Subscribe

Subjects: Weather

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Mike Conley was about 8 years old when his parents bought him a 49-cent drugstore turtle.

Forty years later, Tiger could be the world's oldest Red-eared Slider. The record had been 37 years, 9 months, said Joseph T. Collins, herpetologist emeritus at the University of Kansas Natural History Museum.

Once about the size of a half dollar, Tiger has grown to measure about 8 inches by 10 inches and lives in a metal washtub at Conley's parents' suburban Kansas City home.

"It's really incredible," said Conley, 47, who now lives in Dallas. "I tell people when it comes up in the conversation `Remember those itty-bitty, quarter-size turtles you got at the drugstore? I still have mine.'

"Their jaws always drop."

Tiger dines on dry turtle food, lettuce, raw hamburger and an occasional bug. When the weather is nice, the couple take Tiger's washtub onto the patio or let him wander in the grass.

"Everyone got turtles," Conley said. "They always died, or people would get tired of them and throw them in the lake. This one, we kept."

From: Overland Park, Kansas (AP)

Source: WhiteBoard News for March 6, 2002, http://www.joeha.com/whiteboard


WITandWISDOM™ ISSN 1538-8794 - Copyright © 1998-2002 by Richard G. Wimer - All Rights Reserved
Any questions, comments or suggestions may be sent to Richard G. Wimer.