WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WITandWISDOM(tm) - April 27, 2005
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

He who would do great things should not attempt them all alone. - Seneca Proverb

Source: DailyInBox Presents, http://dailyinbox.com

~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:

Harold and Beulah Bassler, an elderly couple from Martinsburg, Pennsylvania, were enjoying their usual after-church Sunday drive. They were on a small country road, admiring the scenery, when suddenly a large car approached. The driver (who they later discovered was drunk) was aiming right for them. Harold swerved, but there was nowhere for their car to go except off the road. It bounced down an embankment and toppled into a cold gushing stream. Harold and Beulah both shouted for help.

Fortunately, within minutes, many people in the area ran to assist them. It was a small town, and just about everyone knew everyone else. As some of the men hung onto the car, and others grabbed the Basslers to keep them from being pulled away by the current, everyone saw a handsome blue-eyed stranger drive up and stop. He leaped from the car. "Here, let me help. They're going to be freezing!" he said, grabbing two brand new sleeping bags from inside his spotless automobile. As the neighbors pulled Harold and Beulah out of the water, they tore off their outer clothes, and laid each one inside a sleeping bag. When the ambulance arrived, the attendants left the couple in the warm bags while they drove them to Nason Hospital in Roaring Springs, PA.

Excitement over, everyone now looked around for the handsome stranger. But he was nowhere to be found. How could someone have driven off without anyone noticing? And why had he arrived on a little-traveled road---with those comfortable sleeping bags---at just the right time?

Due to the warm bags preventing hypothermia, the Basslers survived their ordeal, and had several happy years together afterward. No one ever saw the stranger again. But there was one more peculiar postscript: Not only did the stranger disappear, the sleeping bags did too. Uncle Weldon Bassler attempted to retrieve them from the hospital, to have them cleaned and possibly returned to the mystery man. But he was greeted with blank looks from the emergency room staff.
"Sleeping bags?" more than one replied. "I don't recall seeing them at all."

Copyrighted 2003 by Joan Wester Anderson. http://www.joanwanderson.com

Source: Christian Voices, http://www.christianvoices.org

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

Cat Diary Human Translator

'HERE KITTY, KITTY, KITTY...'

Means humans want to take you somewhere, most likely the Vet. Avoid it.

'I HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOU!'

Probably left over human food they were about to throw out.

'HERE'S SOME KITTY TREATS...'

Most likely another foil wrapped appeals-to-a-human Madison Avenue
concoction.

Real kitty treats are usually opportunities when no one's paying attention and you get to lick the ice cream in the bowl, or jump on the table for that great piece of meat loaf.

'YOU ARE SOOOOOO CUTE!'

You are about to rub noses with a human. They can never get enough of our tiny fur- coated bodies and irresistible faces. Human noses are sooo warm. Ugh.

'YOU'RE IN MY CHAIR!' or 'YOU'RE TAKING UP TOO MUCH OF THE BED!'

You picked the right spot. You are right where you should be.

'DARN CAT HAIR!'

You left your hair out in the open where humans can see it and properly clean it up.

'STOP THAT!'

Means you were caught. Remember exactly where you were and get back to it - once they leave the house.

'GET OUT OF HERE!'

Do not take this personally. It's usually the first thing they say after you wake them up by sticking your backside in their face.

SNAPPING OF FINGERS:

They want you to come over. If they want me, they'll come get me. Otherwise, get a dog.

'I LOVE YOU...'

Means just that. No translation needed here. And we love you, too.

Source: Scream of the Crop, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/scream_of_the_crop/

~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:

My husband and I often spell words so that our small children won't understand what we're saying. I didn't realize what a habit this had become until one day when my husband and I were in the grocery store at the soup aisle. An aggressive young woman banged into our cart, then nudged me over, blocking my access to the soup.
Annoyed, I looked at my husband and said, "Boy, is she r-u-d-e!"

"Yeah," he replied, "and I'll bet she can s-p-e-l-l."

Source: Laughter for a Saturday
mailto:ed548@yahoo.com?subject=Subscribe_to_Laughter_for_a_Saturday

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

ESCONDIDO, Calif. (AP) A man who recently had received radiation treatment for a medical condition set off a nuclear alert detector on a fire engine, prompting police to close down a roadway in Escondido while authorities searched for a nuclear weapon.
The Rancho Santa Fe Fire Protection District engine crew's radiation monitor sounded Tuesday when the man and his friend walked past the crew on their way to fill a gas can.

The Nuke Alert monitor sounded again as the men walked back to their vehicle.

Firefighters notified the San Diego County Sheriff's Department after they drove by the men's vehicle and the monitor sounded a third time.

Sheriff's deputies pulled over the driver and detained him and his passenger for about one hour while they confirmed that the man was not carrying a nuclear weapon and that he had received radiation treatment, according to Sgt. Robert Healey.

Source USA Today, http://www.usatoday.com/news/


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