WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WITandWISDOM(tm) - March 16, 2006
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

"When you're finished changing, you're finished." - Benjamin Franklin

Source: Weekend Encounter, by Dick Innes, Copyright (c) ACTS International, 2004, http://www.actsweb.org/subscribe.php

~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:

Paul Tournier was a famous Swiss physician and a dedicated Christian author of many insightful books. After he had written his first book, he returned to his medical school to visit his favorite old professor. Granted an afternoon of the venerable man's time, Tournier read his new book to his teacher.

As he completed his reading, he looked up to find tears in the old man's eyes.

"Oh, Paul," said the professor, "That's a wonderful book. Everyone of us Christians should read it."

Tournier was surprised. "I didn't know you were a Christian, professor. When did you become one?"

His old teacher's answer surprised him. His answer: "Just now, as you read your book."

Donald Deffner, Seasonal Illustrations, San Jose: Resource, 1992, p. 24.

Source: Illustrations, http://www.cybersaltlists.org

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

Why God made moms" answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions.

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He Just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God k new she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your Mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home, & dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power
'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your Mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your Mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on her back of her head.

Submitted by Bev

~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:

My brother, a trucker, is often caught in commuter rush-hour traffic. One morning when everything came to a standstill, he sat high up in his 18-wheeler singing and whistling. A passenger in a nearby car, frustrated by the delay, yelled up at my brother, "What are you so happy about?" "I'm already at work!" he cheerfully replied.

Contributed to "All In a Day's Work" by Peter A. Lawrence

Source: DailyInBox Presents, http://dailyinbox.com

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Many of us can’t tell fourteen caret gold from eighteen carat. Some of us can’t even tell gold plate from solid gold. In old London town the jewelers of Goldsmith’s Hall took pride in doing good work, and they wanted each customer to know what he was buying. So they devised a mark of quality, and its use became established by law. When a piece of gold was stamped with a little crown and the figure 18, everyone knew it was eighteen carat. "The mark of the hall" guaranteed it.

Source: SermonCentral Weekly Newsletter,
http://www.sermoncentral.com/newsletter_subscribe.asp


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