WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WITandWISDOM(tm) - June 15, 2006
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

"Don't wait for an employer, friend, or mentor to show appreciation for your work. Take pride in your own efforts on a daily basis." - Denis Waitley

Source: Weekend Encounter, by Dick Innes, Copyright (c) ACTS International, 2004, http://www.actsweb.org/subscribe.php

~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:

For the first 15 years of my marriage, I was a terrible husband. Diane held a full-time job, became my secretary, mothered our daughters, and waited on me hand and foot. I loved my wife very much, but I hadn't learned how to show my love. God used a vacuum cleaner to teach me.

First, I learned that our cat was terrified of vacuum cleaners. That kept me entertained for about an hour. Then as I vacuumed in one direction, a stripe would appear. Entranced, I striped the whole room. Then I went crossways, creating a checkerboard pattern. I got so carried away that I dusted the furniture and straightened the entire house.

I was in my easy chair once again when Diane came home. She struggled through the door with a bag of groceries under each arm, kicked the door shut with one foot, and then took in the house with an expert glance. Her mouth dropped open. Slowly the bags slipped from her grasp and dropped to the floor. "Who did this?" she asked.

"I did," I said.

Without warning, she attacked. Diving on me, she smothered me with kisses and hugs. The kisses grew more passionate. We broke the chair!

The vacuum taught me an important lesson: love is expressed with more than just words.

By Ken Davis, Adapted from Lighten Up! (Zondervan, 2000) Copyright 2006 by the author or Christianity Today International/Men of Integrity magazine. May/June 2006, Vol. 9, No. 3

Source: Men of Integrity, http://tinyurl.com/jsmyw

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

Creative Excuses

I know none of the housework got done. I was reflecting on new and innovative ways to please you.

I'm taking a few sick days. I'm going to see my doctor, but he moved to Maui, so it could be awhile before I'm back.

I'll be oversleeping for the next couple of months. I got a grant for some research into dream therapy.

Not coming in, boss. I had my radio alarm tuned to the all news station and now I'm too depressed to get out of bed.

No, I haven't changed the oil in my car in four years. Why should I? It still hasn't used up the oil that's in there!

I'm sorry, my husband and I won't be able to attend your wedding. He hasn't recovered from ours, yet.

It makes no sense to end my vacation by going back to work. Work was what caused my need for a vacation in the first place!

I'm not apathetic, I'm emotionally mellow.

Yeah, I could take the trash out, but we'd just make more.

No, I'm not working less ... I'm preparing for retirement.

No, I didn't burn the dinner, I've created a tribute to charcoal.

Selected from "The Dog Ate My Car Keys & Other Great Excuses Not To Go To Work" with editing by Mark Raymond

Source: Mark Mail, http://mrhumor.net/

~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:

We had just built a vacation home in a small town in Maine and wanted to burn trash. Uncertain about regulations for outdoor fires, we spoke to a man at the town hall. We couldn't get a permit for a bonfire, he informed us, but no permit was needed for a campfire.

"What's the difference?" my husband asked.

"If ya got a fryin' pan," he answered, "it's a campfire. Otherwise, it's a bonfire."

The children merrily toasted marshmallows over our "campfire" that night as I stood nearby, frying pan in hand.

Contributed to "Life In These United States" by Suzanne Tatarczuk

Source: Beliefnet Presents, http://www.beliefnet.com/user/newsletter_choose.asp

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Watch Football (Soccer) Now

It took me a while to figure this out but Ive managed to find a live feed for the World Cup games that are NOT on the BBC. BBC shows the games on the net via http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport

Easy steps are as follows...

1 - Download TVUpalyer. Timer will count down to 0. Then click on Download:
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=60OB4XGA

2 - Install it... Open

3 Double click on-10007-CCTV-5 OR double click on-10022-ESPN2 and wait 1-2 min for end of buffering, Enjoy!

Submitted by Mark Burrows


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